Not as pretty as it looks
by Coffee Cups and Bow Ties
Summary: Sebastian is determined to get into Blaine's pants, but there is only one thing stopping him. Kurt Elizabeth Hummel. Rated M for a tiny tiny tinyy bit of smut.


When it comes to sex, I'm the most experienced kid at Dalton. I've topped, bottomed and even done three ways. Sure, you could call me a slut, man whore, Crabs-Magnet, but I just love to have fun.

I'd thought I had seen it all, until I saw that pretty little ass of Blaine Anderson stalking around the corridors of Dalton. Since that moment I knew I would do whatever it took to get into his skin tight pants.

I know what your thinking. Sebastian, your hot, Blaine's hot, it should be no problem to bag that sex on a stick and get down and dirty. But there was one problem. His gay faced boyfriend.

Kurt Hummel. How do I even begin to explain Kurt Hummel? That princess has got his super hot boyfriend, or as I like to call him, Frodo, wrapped around his well manicured fingers, refusing to let go. But whatever, I am totally ready for a challenge.

It's not like I am some bumbling high school boy, searching for love. No way, I don't believe in love. Love is something that straight people tell themselves they're in, so they can get laid. And then they end up hurting each other, because all this 'love' shit is all based on lies to begin with. No, I believe in fucking. It's honest, it's efficient. You get in and out with the maximum of pleasure.

I know everything there is to know about gay sex. Well actually, I'm pretty good at straight sex too but playing for the other team when you get down and dirty is so much more playful and pleasurable for each person. I have a theory that I have a kind of sixth sense. I can sense when people have lost their V-plates by looking at tiny gestures and eye contact that most people dont notice. And I could tell from my sexy-radar that Blainers and his little virgin boyfriend hadn't done the deed.

When you are a hot, 17 year old gay kid who still has their V-Card shiny and fully in tact, you are bound to be sexually fustraighted. Trust me, I've slept around with many a guy, so I thought getting into the curly haired hobbits pants would be a simple equation of flirting and talking dirty. So, when Blaine resisted my offer, I felt mildly humiliated. I worried for days whether I had lost my magic touch which worked on every guy I've ever tried it on. I didn't know what was wrong with me, it was the least confident I had ever been, which is saying something because I am always confident because I know I am always right. And if I am not right about something, I always find my way around it. But this problem was different, it was tricky. Blaine was so wrapped up in this 'love' bullshit that he had forgotten the pure and simple pleasure of fucking. I knew he was going to be a challenge, and so I had to think of another foolproof way to get a share of his fucking amazing ass.

One night, I was in my dorm at Dalton watching porn and wanking off. I was really close to an orgasm (I told you I had magic fingers), when I heard it. It sounded sort of like a thump. Almost like someone had thrown something at a wall. I knew that Blaine's dorm was next to mine, and Kurt recenlty joined him in his room, but I shrugged it off, assuming Kurt threw one of his fucking mental sweaters at the wall. I mean seriously, all the bondage and jewels on those things must make it way a tonn. 'Maybe thats why he is still a virgin, because he has a mishapen body' I thought to myself, sniggering at my own words.

I had already dismissed the noise and carried on from where I left off, when I heard it again.

And again.

And again.

And then I heard a loud scream, followed by a deep groan, reverberating through the wall. And then it came to me, they must be having a fight. The screaming and moaning coming from little Blainers and Kurtsie was their first fight. And the first fights are always the worst. Its the point in which a relationship is most vulnerable. Not that I would know, I don't do relationships. I do sex.

I thought this was the perfect time to walk into their arguement, make some snide remark, make things awkward between them, then leave, the tension between them being too much for them to even stay in a relationship any longer and ditch the love business. That little hot ass hobbit would come crying to me and I would finally get what I wanted, my cock inside his ass.

Before I knew what I was doing, I ran out of my dorm and put my hand on the door handle, opening it with no difficulty. They had not locked the door.

This time, I was the one screaming.

I could see Kurt in there, pressed flush up against Blaine's body, slamming his hips into Blaine's, his front glued to his back. The noises that were coming out of their mouths told me straight away what way going on, and obviously they realised that I was standing there wide eyed, gawking at them. Both boys looked up at me, wide eyed and trembling.

They were having sex. They were having sex up against the wall. Kurt was inside of- of my shit, I will never forget that sight.

The next thing that came out of Blaine's mouth however was not due to the fact that Kurt was inside of him.

"SHIT. SEBASTIAN, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM."

"CRAP. I-I-" For once in my life, I was speechless.

"GET OUT. JUST GET OUT" Now Kurt's shrill voice was screaming at me, the pitch rising with every word he said.

I hastily ran out of the room, finally slamming the door shut, covering my eyes and holding back a groan. 'Well that didn't go to plan', I thought.

Looking back on it, maybe this mission was even too tricky for ME to complete. But that never stopped me before. I am still going to try and get into the other gay's pants, whatever it takes.

But secretly, deep down inside, I'm proud of little gay faced Kurtsie, because if the moans that Blaine was letting out of his gorgeous red lips was any indication, the sex he was giving was really good.


End file.
